Strippers Vs Werewolves (2012)
The title alone conjures up an expectation of quality that you can only hope is not matched too often. Inexplicably, the film manages to rope in some performers that would not normally be expected to be found dead (or undead) in a project like this. This is a solidly British production, surprisingly littered with stars from largely British television and even the odd movie star from across the pond.
Starring Adele Silva (Emmerdale) as a stripper that accidentally stabs Chief Werewolf Jack Ferris (Martin Kemp; Eastenders, The Krays, Spandau Ballet) in the eye with a silver fountain pen during a private dance, it is only a matter of time before the strip club is awash with howling-moon types, intent on revenge.
If you take a look around the bar, you can see Alan Ford (Lock Stock, Snatch), Steven Berkoff (A Clockwork Orange), Billy Murray (The Bill, Eastenders) and even Robert Englund (Freddy Kreuger).
What you may find yourself asking is what on earth are they all doing here? Why indeed...this is a dreadful piece of cinema with horrible continuity errors, dreadful scripting, an awful plot and absolutely terrible acting. All aspiring actors should take note of this effort and know that while they may not be as recognised as some of the luminaries on show here, even the greats can be made to look ridiculous. Truth positive that a film alone cannot be saved by its acting talent.
You can only hope that this is all very tongue in cheek and that they were all in on the joke to begin with. To be honest, it looks like it was made for about a hundred quid and a massive bowl of goodwill.